When I was six years old, I gave my first blowjob.
“It’s a game”, said He. “Don’t you want to play?”
It was too big, and I threw up on him.
He said I’d do better the next time.

When I was seven years old, I watched a group of fellow second graders cheer as a boy in my class tried to kiss me. He hugged me from behind, giggling all the while.
I threw sand in his eyes, and was sent to the Principal.

When I was eight years old, I had an elderly teacher ask me to stay behind in class. He carried me on his shoulders, and called me pretty.
“Teacher’s Pet!” my friends declared, the envy visible on their faces.
They ignored me at lunch that day.

When I was nine years old, an older girl on the school bus would ask me to lift…

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Chauvinism at the campus

A female student, wearing a casual salwar kameez, was sleeping in the prayer room at our campus in the afternoon today. The room is small and is built with thick glass in such a way that you can only be seen from the outside if you are very near to the glass. While she was asleep, her kameez was displaced only a little near waist and could be seen from the outside of the room.

None of us noticed it until a male teacher comes out of nowhere and started making a scene out of it. He started pointing that out and literally shouting. He was saying to the nearby female students how that student should be told how “inappropriate” the view was and “one should even click a pic of it and then show it to her” .

He didn’t stop just there. She was eventually awakened by the female clerk and he kept humiliating her, saying how “everything could be seen from outside”. Eventually people started to gather around and see her being humiliated.

Sleeping in the prayer room is not allowed. So he started with scolding her about that. But if you heard his statements carefully, he was insulting her more about her dress than sleeping there.

Would he have reacted the same way if there was a boy sleeping inside the prayer room with his shirt displaced?

Was the fact that a male teacher making such comments and questions to a female student APPROPRIATE ?

Was the teacher reminding the student about rules or was simply harassing her?

New University – Part 1

When I shifted to the new university, I was totally excited. Quality of education is far better here than that in my previous university. But I was more excited about the vast number of opportunities I was about to get here. I was excited about meeting new people who are already working in the field I am interested in, i.e., robotics.

I knew things were about to get tough here. But it was tougher than I expected. One thing that is strictly maintained is following rules. Nothing is more important than the university’s policies here. Nobody is spared from doing as they are told….not even teachers. My previous university was not this strict, so it took me time to get used to this fact. I don’t have any problem in following certain rules as I know they are made for a reason. It’s just sometimes they are just too much to bear.

But that’s okay. Another aspect here is that there are more students here than there was in my previous university and majority of them prefer to stay in groups…groups they formed before they joined this university or when they first came here. There is no problem with groups, I can understand that people want to spend time  with like-minded people more. What is problematic is that once you belong to a certain group, you are not allowed to mingle with others as much. Also if you are new and want to join particular group, you most probably will be rejected because they don’t want any new member in their group.

I have always been a loner. I love to ponder on different things without getting disturbed. Also, I don’t want to feel obliged to any group or people. I would like to talk and make friends with anyone I find worth being with, regardless their company.

Shifting To Another University

When you join a university for the first time, it is not easy to cope. You are tensed and excited, you meet new people who have recently joined like you. You look around the place and think, “This is the place I will have to stay for four years.” You are shy on the first day. But eventually you make friends and acquaintances. It does not take much to settle down.

But transferring to another university is tough. When you transfer your credits to another university, firstly, you are annoyed to know that you might have to repeat some subjects again because the new university did not allow any waiver on those subjects, even when you had good scores in them. Then, you realize you do not fall under any particular batch completely. Semester wise, it is your first; Subject wise, you have completed almost 2 semesters. Also the class rooms are usually filled with senior students who are either retaking the subject or taking it for the first time. Either way, it is hard to make friends. Who can you actually call your friend anyway? Nobody matches with your quality.

So you decide to make some acquaintances first. You suddenly feel pressured. You know very well how people tend to become judgmental when you have recently transferred from another place. So on the first day, you bite your tongue most of the time. You talk only when you need to.

But slowly, with  casual small talks now and then, you make some acquaintances. Can you call them your friends  yet? You are not sure. But you know it is going to be alright. Besides, you have always been a loner. You know you will be able to manage yourself without group of friends. You have confidence in yourself.